Regret
by Narcolus
Summary: ANOTHER ONE. KILL ME. :D


Edwin stood out on the balcony, looking out into the night sky above him as he watched the stars glitter with beauty. He loved this spot of the house just because he could gaze at the stars at such a wonderful angle at night. He came to the balcony only to calm himself down because recently he let his thoughts run wild, and when he did, they told him nasty things.

Ever since he left his little baby boy and his absolutely fantastic wife, he's been regretting it ever since, and his mind always scolded him badly whenever he would think about them again. They would tell him that he was a bad father and that he didn't deserve them in the first place. They would also tell them that he never cared about his child and would try to lower his self-esteem.

 _I do,_ Edwin would always try to assure himself. _I really do!_

But it would never work out.

Joseph, on the other hand, was laying in his bed in his room, reading a book. He himself never had a problem with his confidence; in fact, he was quite boastful himself because of his achievements and abilities, especially because he was always invested inside of the plot of the books he reads, just like Edwin. The only difference is that the thoughts inside of Edwin's head would usually always block out the words inside of the book he'd be reading.

As Joseph turned the page, that split second of transition to one scene to another allowed him to realize something that he hadn't noticed before: He didn't see Edwin the entire day. He decided to go search for him, since, of course, Edwin is his boss, and he cares for Edwin. So, he grabbed his bookmark, put it inside of the book, closed the book, and went off to go find Edwin.

It wasn't all that difficult to find him, really; Joseph remembered Edwin telling him that he absolutely adored the balcony, so that was the first place Joseph looked. And, of course, that's where Edwin was.

"Hey, Boss, are you alright?" Joseph asked, walking up to Edwin.

As Joseph stood beside Edwin, Edwin turned his head slightly towards Joseph before replying with, "I've been better."

"What's the matter?"

"Well, do you remember me talking to you about my family?"

"Yeah, why?"

"I've been… thinking a lot about them lately."

"How so?"

"I've been thinking about the choice I've made. About leaving them."

"And?"

"And I think that was the worst decision of my life, Joseph."

Joseph frowned and put a hand on Edwin's back, trying to comfort him as Edwin looked back up at the bright stars above. "I know you miss them, Boss. I know you miss them a lot," Joseph said.

"I do, yet they don't believe me!" Edwin snapped, turning to face Joseph. "They tell me that I didn't care, but I did! I don't know what compelled me to just leave them there to rot without me, but I swear it wasn't hatred! It was anything but hatred, I know that!"

Edwin turned back in front of him and buried his face in his palms as Joseph reached out to try and hold Edwin. "God, I'm... I'm so sorry," he whispered. "It's just, I... I always try to own up to my mistakes, even if I might've been unaware of it at the time because no matter what it is, a mistake is a mistake... but I... I can't! I don't know how."

Joseph let Edwin sit there and cry into his hands for a while because he was trying to muster up some words to say. Right when he thought he gathered up enough words to form a decent sentence, Edwin derailed his train of thought by saying, "I miss them, Joseph. I miss my baby. I miss my wife. I miss them so much."

"Boss-"

"Aha," Edwin laughed quietly, "I'm rubbish, aren't I? I'm absolute garbage. After deciding to leave them for good, I instantly regret and whine about it. Pathetic, isn't it? Why would she even want to be with me in the first place?"

"Boss, don't say that," Joseph insisted.

"Oh, but I'm just a silly man who worries too much about everything and everyone," Edwin sighed faintly.

Joseph looked away from Edwin and said nothing.

Edwin noticed this and said, "I'm so sorry Joseph. You don't have to carry my bur-"

"Boss," Joseph interrupted. "You've done so much for me. It's about time I do something for you, right?"

Edwin's eyes widened as he turned his head to look at Joseph. "Honestly?" he gasped.

"Honestly," Joseph said, nodding.

Edwin looked away from Joseph, trying to gather his thoughts, but no matter how hard he tried, his thoughts continued to stay as a fucked-up mess. " _Gah,_ " Edwin yelled out, "I'm sorry!"

"It's fine," Joseph said with a small smile on his face.

Edwin opened his mouth to speak but was interrupted by the sound of a glass sliding door being opened.

"Hey," a familiar voice called out.

Edwin and Joseph turned their heads towards the sliding door behind them (which lead out into the balcony) and saw Levi standing there with a half-empty champagne glass in his hand. "What're you two doing?" Levi asked, walking towards them.

"Just talking about my family," Edwin said in a quiet voice.

Levi cocked an eyebrow. "Hm, really?" he said. "I'm sorry."

Edwin waved a hand around. "No, no no," he laughed, "it's fine. I'm okay now."

"Wait, really?" Joseph gasped. "You are? That was fast."

"Well, now that I know that someone actually _cares,_ I'm satisfied," Edwin explained.

"Alright, completely ignore me. That's fine too," Levi blurted as he turned around and began to walk back towards the sliding door.

"Wait!" Joseph and Edwin shouted simultaneously.

Levi turned his head back towards Joseph and Edwin. "What," he growled.

"I myself wasn't ignoring you," Edwin said, "I was just speaking to Joseph!"

Joseph nodded.

"Ugh," Levi yelled, walking back towards them, "fine, I'll stay. Just don't exclude me in your conversations this time. My feelings have been damaged."

The three men laughed light-heartedly as they chatted the night away.


End file.
